Personal Journey Entry # 42

I had a difficult time celebrating today or ringing the bell to mark the end of Radiation treatments. Everyone at MaineHealth in Scarborough was thrilled for me and congratulated me, as if I had accomplished something truly significant. I had many reactions and comments on Facebook, and I am grateful for all the good wishes, but I don’t feel I did anything but survive 28 trips to Scarborough. Shay says otherwise. She saw how the treatments affected my body and thinks that finishing this phase is a big deal. I’ll get back to you on that.

This roller coaster ride has had us up when we thought the surgery to remove my esophagus was the end of the cancer. We were wrong. We rose again when Dr. Boston told us she was able to get it all, but she was wrong, and we rode back down the hill. So as our car crested the hill once more, I held back my desire to celebrate. There will be a time. Today is not that time.

I have been bombarded with numerous passages about purpose at church, on Facebook, and on Instagram. I feel like God is raising His voice to me, and He does not need to. I got it. I got it in January when we heard the word cancer for the first time.

What we got this week was proof of the strength of love in fighting this ugly disease. It was a night of good food, great people, and enough love to light up the pond. We had our Imerman Angel, Dave, and his wife, Kathy, from Illinois, and we gathered about 24 beautiful Pond People to celebrate them and life. We had prayer, laughter, hugs, and tears. We showed why this community is our paradise on earth. These are the people who have been by our side since this journey started. They have cooked meals, driven me to treatments, and checked in when a visit wasn’t possible. These are the people that God put on earth to join together to battle anything that threatens our group. They will beat my cancer, and I will never be able to repay them for their deeds, thoughts, and prayers. Shay and I will do our best to pay it forward.

We all have our purpose. We simply need to be ready when it presents itself. My purpose is clear. I am waiting to have an Imerman Mentee matched with me to mentor through the journey to beat cancer, as Dave has done for me. Our paperwork is in to initiate our Cancer Support Ministry, and we are awaiting the call to proceed. It is also time to get back on the bus and get those kids to school. My first day is Tuesday, and I am looking forward to seeing my little friends and hearing their voices. Life is good. No, life is great, and with Shay on one side and God on the other, we will make the most of every day and opportunity.

I thank you all for stopping by. We love you all, even those whom we will never meet. Cancer may have brought us together through this forum, and it is with our united effort that we will celebrate and ring the bell.

God bless you and let Him show you the way. Ray