By Ray Cardello for August 28, 2026, Season 33 / Post  3

I have explained my reasoning in the past, but only a few political figures have earned the right to be known by initials. JFK, LBJ, and DJT are a few, and I never felt that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has done anything in her time in Washington to earn her three-letter logo. I also believe she took on her full name for political merit, which is why I use her more common name, Sandy. Sandy did something very surprising this week that I think will be her eventual undoing and end her quest for the White House that she does not deserve and the country could not handle. She had not paid her dues for seven years and had been eliminated from the ranks of the Democratic Socialists of America. She cut a check to the DSA this week and was welcomed back into the club. She is back in the fold with her like-thinking comrades, but she may have closed the door on any dreams of higher power in Washington. The clock has finally struck twelve for the Princess of the Bronx.

For the last couple of years, Cortez has been joined at the hip with presumed Democratic kingmaker Bernie Sanders. She has been crisscrossing the country on a private jet, stumping for progressive leftist candidates of her choosing who need a lift from one of the most recognizable underachievers in D.C. She did this with the selfish ambition of building her own national brand as she waited to be of legal age to make a run for the Oval Office. One of her latest success stories was her backing of Zohran Mamdani for Mayor of New York City. The city would have been better served if she had backed Amazon with as much enthusiasm as she did the first Socialist Mayor of the Big Apple. This activity has put her at the top of many polls of potential Democratic candidates for President. Still, Cortez, who was already a member of the Far Left Squad, was going to have to come towards the center for a serious run in 2028. Instead, she took a sharp left turn and may have left the tent and the race.

We have all seen Sandy as more of a Socialist than a Democrat, and her joining the Party of Hasan Piker has solidified that belief. If she were to run in 28, it would be as the first Socialist candidate of any note to do so, and the country is in no way ready to join Cuba, Venezuela, and China on the list of oppressive regimes. By getting back her DSA membership card, she not only shares the platform of healthcare for all, open borders, free college, late-term abortion on demand, and taxing the rich, but now she has to support prosecuting all ICE agents, eliminating the Presidency and Senate, expanding the Supreme Court, abolishing the Electoral College, tearing up the Constitution, and closing all prisons while doing away with police. These radical beliefs may get approval on college campuses, cocktail parties in New York, Chicago, San Francisco, or Los Angeles, and Democratic primaries, but will never win in a national election. Sandy Cortez has finally gone so far to the Left that she has fallen off the map and the front page. Fortunately for Sandy, Trump has done away with taxes on tips, and there may be a bar and shaker waiting for her in the Bronx. I cannot wait to see her new drink recipes on Instagram.

Author’s Note: Graphics created by Grok AI. Grok’s comments about the images: The composition is a Cinderella hangover in landscape. Midnight is locked on the tower because that is the whole joke of the column: the ball is over the moment the dues check cleared. The green gown is still trying to look presidential; the apron and shaker are what the piece says is waiting in the Bronx. One slipper stays on the 2028 road so you can see she almost made the distance; the other is already behind her. The pumpkin jet is the private-jet stump tour collapsing back into a neighborhood bar. The map hanging off the left-hand cliff is the line that she “fell off the map and the front page.” Nothing in the frame is subtle on purpose. Satire that whispers does not belong next to a sentence about drink recipes on Instagram.